You Don't Always Get What You Ask For (but sometimes you get something better)

Every spring I have an overwhelming desire to plant a vegetable garden. And every spring something happens to prevent that desire from bearing fruit, so to speak.

This year I decided to start small. All I really wanted were some tomatoes, cucumbers, bell peppers, basil, cilantro, and mint. Everyone in my family enjoys these, and I already had empty beds outside my back door, ready to be planted. Easy, right?

So during one of Katie's art lessons, I lugged Owen and Audrey over to Fred's to see what they had to offer. The plants all looked healthy. I got exactly what I wanted, plus a few things that I didn't really want. I have a hard time saying no to children who are asking for healthy things! So we added in one watermelon plant, one catnip plant ("Hugo will LOVE this!"), and a few flowers.

The mint never sprouted. The cilantro bolted to seed in the heat of June. The cucumbers dried up and shrivelled away. The bell pepper plants kept blossoming, then...nothing. I did get a handful of grape tomatoes, and currently have exactly four small, green slicer tomatoes on the vine.

 Gangly Tomato Plant

 Sad Little Pepper(less) Plant

And what became of that superfluous catnip? And the watermelon, which I personally dislike?

Beautiful Monstrous Catnip

 Eight-Foot Long Watermelon Plant

Baby Watermelon (Okay...so it IS cute.)

My friend Lee Anne says there must be a Gospel message here. I haven't had time to wrap my brain around it yet, but I think she is right. I do know that there is one plant that clearly displays getting something we do not deserve - my sunflowers....

We studied birds last year for Science class and managed to attract many of them to our tiny, suburban back yard. Almost every bird likes sunflower seeds, so we keep some scattered on the patio outside our kitchen door.

When Kevin mows the yard, he uses the leaf blower to blow all the hulls away. Much to our surprise, a small growth of sunflowers began to sprout up in a tiny corner of the patio. Today, they blossomed. It was so lovely to see the yellow petals, which we had not intentionally planted, open towards the morning sun. What a beautiful background for our bird watching!

 Lovely Sunflowers

 Sunflower Blossom (Look closely to see a tiny ant!)

Mockingbird Enjoying a Cool Drink

Undeserved favors...thank You, God, for your blessings!

Praying God's Word in Suffering (2)

God of Peace,

You have commanded me to not be anxious about anything. Remind me to make my requests known to You by prayer and supplication. Help me to make these requests with thanksgiving, for You have promised to guard my heart and mind, in Christ Jesus, with your peace - a peace that passes all understanding.

Cause me to think about things that are true, honorable, just, pure, lovely, commendable, excellent, and worthy of praise. May I put to practice those things I have learned, received, heard, and seen, so that You, God of peace, will be with me!

Make me content in whatever situation I am in - in any and every circumstance - for I can do all things through You. Give me strength! (Philippians 4)

God of Provision,

Assist me in obeying Your command to not be anxious about my life. Thank You for examples of Your provision and care in the world around me; You feed the birds of the air and clothe the grass of the field, and You consider my life to be of more value than these. Being anxious will not add a single hour to my span of life. Increase my faith! You are my heavenly Father, and You know what I need. Above all, help me to seek first Your kingdom and Your righteousness, and to trust You to supply my needs. (Matthew 6)

Praying God's Word in Suffering (1)

Sovereign God,

Cause me to rejoice in the hope of Your glory! But even more than that, may I rejoice in even my sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope. Thank You that Your love has been poured into my heart through the Holy Spirit Who has been given to me! Thank You that while I was an ungodly sinner, Christ died for me, to justify me from my sin and save me from Your wrath. (Romans 5)

Compassionate Father,

I praise You for Your Spirit, who helps me in my weakness! I do not know what to pray for as I ought, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for me with groanings too deep for words. And You who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for me according to Your will. And I know that for those who love You all things work together for good, for those who are called according to Your purpose. So what should I say to these things? If You are for me, who can be against me? Who can separate me from the love of Christ? Can tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? No! In all these things I am more than a conqueror through You who loves me. For I am sure that nothing in all creation will be able to separate me from Your love. (Romans 8)

Learning to Trust

Shortly after Audrey was born, I was diagnosed with a rare blood-clotting disorder called Factor V Leiden. This is a genetic disorder, and most people who have it are heterozygous, meaning that one of their parents has FVL and has passed on a mutated gene. Being the overachiever that I am, BOTH of my parents have FVL and I have inherited the mutated gene from each of them (homozygous). Without scaring myself all over again, I'll just say that I'm at high risk (I think I read 30-140 fold) for several dangerous possibilities, including blood clots, stroke, and heart-attack. All three of my children will be heterozygous for Factor V.

Back in mid-May, Kevin and I went to see the new Henderson baby. On the way home my arm went numb and I felt close to passing out; I felt as if I couldn't breathe. We headed straight for the nearest emergency room and hung out there for lots of tests and monitoring. A few hours later we were sent home with no answers and a hefty bill. I followed up with my general practitioner's office and was made to feel that I had experienced a panic attack, which would be very strange, considering that I was on a date with my husband when this happened! I almost believed this diagnosis until I was telling my dad about it. He kept nodding and finally said that he'd had that happen two or three times. "One time I was getting some tea out of the refrigerator and woke up on the floor in a puddle of tea!" Of course, he didn't TELL anyone - crazy man! My mom has also had a TIA and said the symptoms were very similar.

Fast forward to last night, when Kevin and I were headed to bed. I had almost forgotten about the ER trip, other than the fact that the bill is on my cork board so I can remember to pay them something. The fingertips on my left hand had felt like they were asleep for a few hours, but I thought it might be from playing bass a bit earlier. We were in bed, chatting about this and that (okay, okay, I was chatting and Kevin was saying "uh huh" and probably hoping I would hush so he could sleep) when it hit me again.

As we both lay there, alternately praying out loud, I couldn't help but be afraid. What if something really happens? My family needs me. I want to live to see my grandchildren. I fought for some time to keep calm, breathe, and not think about the possibilities.

Sometime in the night a major storm rolled through. The lightening was so awesome that it kept our room lit almost constantly. Somewhere in that loud thunder I felt that God was rebuking me.

Then the LORD answered Job out of the whirlwind and said: "Who is this that darkens counsel by words without knowledge? Dress for action like a man; I will question you, and you make it known to me. "Where were you when I laid the foundation of the earth? Tell me, if you have understanding." ~ Job 38:1-4

Does God need me? Can I add anything to His purpose? If it is His will for me to suffer, or even to die, will He not still do all that He sovereignly decrees? I have seen in the lives of dear brothers and sisters that God does, indeed, work through tragedy. I have seen His provision for those who have lost much. How small my faith must be to know these things, to see His work, and to still doubt. If Christ is all I need, why do I grasp at control? Why do I cling to loved ones here on earth as if they are all that matters? They are a wonderful gift from God, but they belong to Him. He can do with them as He pleases, and whatever He pleases to do will be for my good and His glory.

I do believe this. God, help my unbelief! I trust in you and ask You for peace in the storm. I answer You with the words of Job:

Then Job answered the LORD and said: "I know that you can do all things, and that no purpose of yours can be thwarted. 'Who is this that hides counsel without knowledge?' Therefore I have uttered what I did not understand, things too wonderful for me, which I did not know. 'Hear, and I will speak; I will question you, and you make it known to me.' I had heard of you by the hearing of the ear, but now my eye sees you; therefore I despise myself, and repent in dust and ashes." ~ Job 42:1-6

Baby Shower Devotion 3 - Moses and Parenting

Other Outlines
Baby Shower Devotion 1: Warning Against Idolatry
Baby Shower Devotion 2: Psalm 23

How to Respond When Your Child Sins Against You:
A Lesson From the Forty-Year Wilderness Wandering

I. Introduction

Quote from Jay Younts in Everyday Talk:
“Moses was charged with leading Israel out of slavery in Egypt to freedom in Canaan. God handed Moses an infant nation that was virtually born as it passed through the waters of the Red Sea. Israel could not feed herself, she could not defend herself, she did not know how to what was right. The job of raising Israel to maturity fell to Moses.”

The relationship between Moses and the Israelites is a useful study for parents. Let’s look at some ways in which the Israelites were like our own little ones.

II. God’s Top Two for Children - Obedience and Honor (Ephesians 6:1-2)

The Israelites promised to obey - “Then he took the Book of the Covenant and read it in the hearing of the people. And they said, ‘All that the LORD has spoken we will do, and we will be obedient.’” Exodus 24:7

A. Disobedience

1. The Manna Hording Incident
“And Moses said to them, ‘Let no one leave any of it over till the morning.’ But they did not listen to Moses. Some left part of it till the morning, and it bred worms and stank. And Moses was angry with them.” Exodus 16:19-20

2. The “I Told You Not To Go There” Incident
“Then you answered me, ‘We have sinned against the LORD. We ourselves will go up and fight, just as the LORD our God commanded us.’ And every one of you fastened on his weapons of war and thought it easy to go up into the hill country. And the LORD said to me, ‘Say to them, Do not go up or fight, for I am not in your midst, lest you be defeated before your enemies.’ So I spoke to you, and you would not listen; but you rebelled against the command of the LORD and presumptuously went up into the hill country. Then the Amorites who lived in that hill country came out against you and chased you as bees do and beat you down in Seir as far as Hormah. And you returned and wept before the LORD, but the LORD did not listen to your voice or give ear to you.” Deuteronomy 1:41-45

B. Disrespect (via Complaining)

1. Pick A Chapter, Any Chapter
Exodus 15:24, 16:2-3, 17:2-3; Numbers 11:1, 20:2-5

2. The Carnivorous Incident
“Now the rabble that was among them had a strong craving. And the people of Israel also wept again and said, ‘Oh that we had meat to eat! We remember the fish we ate in Egypt that cost nothing, the cucumbers, the melons, the leeks, the onions, and the garlic. But now our strength is dried up, and there is nothing at all but this manna to look at.” Numbers 11:4-6

3. The Worthless Food Incident
“…the people became impatient on the way. And the people spoke against God and against Moses, ‘Why have you brought us up out of Egypt to die in the wilderness? For there is no food and no water, and we loathe this worthless food.’” Numbers 21:4-5

(Do these examples sound familiar? You might want to remind your children that these incidents of complaint and ingratitude were rewarded by plague and fiery serpents!)

C. The scriptures record that Israel was also guilty of self-centeredness and self-pity. Lack of self-control was displayed by frequent weeping and angry outbursts towards Moses. Exodus 18 records Moses’ everyday duties - giving advice and settling disputes from morning until night (sound familiar?). There is one major difference in Moses and you, though….Moses did this for forty years!

III. Our Primary Concern Drives Our Reaction

A. Moses’ Good Reaction to the Golden Calf Incident
“But Moses implored the LORD his God and said, ‘O LORD, why does your wrath burn hot against your people, whom you have brought out of the land of Egypt with great power and with a mighty hand? Why should the Egyptians say, With evil intent did he bring them out, to kill them in the mountains and to consume them from the face of the earth? Turn from your burning anger and relent from this disaster against your people. Remember Abraham, Isaac, and Israel, your servants, to whom you swore by your own self, and said to them, I will multiply your offspring as the stars of heaven, and all this land that I have promised I will give to your offspring, and they shall inherit it forever.’ And the LORD relented from the disaster that he had spoken of bringing on his people.” Exodus 32:11-14

“So I lay prostrate before the LORD for these forty days and forty nights, because the LORD had said he would destroy you.” Deuteronomy 9:25

(See also a similar reaction to the We Won’t Go Incident in Numbers 14:13-19)

B. Moses’ Excellent Reaction to the “Enter the Land, But I’m Not Coming” Incident
“‘Now therefore, if I have found favor in your sight, please show me now your ways, that I may know you in order to find favor in your sight. Consider too that this nation is your people.’ And he said, ‘My presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.’ And he said to him, ‘If your presence will not go with me, do not bring us up from here. For how shall it be known that I have found favor in your sight, I and your people? Is it not in your going with us, so that we are distinct, I and your people, from every other people on the face of the earth?’ And the LORD said to Moses, ‘This very thing that you have spoken I will do, for you have found favor in my sight, and I know you by name.’ Moses said, ‘Please show me your glory.’” Exodus 33:13-18

IV. Closing Remarks

Moses’ desire was for the honor, reputation, and glory of God. He was not concerned for himself. Of course, we know that Moses was a sinful person, as we all are. He did not always respond in a way that pleased God. You can read about Moses’ sinful reactions in the Just Kill Me Now Incident (Numbers 11:11-15) and the We’re Thirsty Again Incident (Numbers 20:6-12). That final one cost Moses the moment he had looked forward to for so long - crossing into the Promised Land.

If we truly believe that our children are sinners from birth, it should not surprise us when they sin. Rather, we should expect and plan for those difficult times. This will allow us to focus on God’s glory and our child’s need of a Savior rather than on our own hurt, embarrassment, and inconvenience. We must realize that the root of all sin is directed towards God. “Your grumbling is not against us but against the LORD.” Exodus 16:8

Finally, let these promises encourage you.

God Himself will comfort you:
“Now may our Lord Jesus Christ himself, and God our Father, who loved us and gave us eternal comfort and good hope through grace, comfort your hearts and establish them in every good work and word.” 1 Thessalonians 2:16-17

He will be with you:
“It is the LORD who goes before you. He will be with you; he will not leave you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed.” Deuteronomy 31:8

And He will equip you:
“His divine power has granted to us all things that pertain to life and godliness, through the knowledge of him who called us to his own glory and excellence…” 2 Peter 1:3

Everyday Talk, Chapter 5

The good folk at Shepherd Press have sent me a review copy of Broken-Down House. Of course, I haven't been moving at the speed of light around here lately, and I'm not quite in the middle of Everyday Talk. So, what to do? I think I will try to finish what I've started, then move on to the new book, praying that I'll find more than five minutes here and there to do so!

Chapter 5 is entitled "Don't Be Ordinary." This chapter had a profound impact on me, bringing me to repentance. The basic thought is that our children are born sinners. They will sin against us. So how will we respond? Jay gives several ordinary options: despair, anger, avoidance, self-pity, or ignoring the problem altogether ("just get over it"). For me, it wasn't a matter of which response I am prone to give, but more a matter of which response I will give THIS time. I am guilty of all of these.

Although I do believe total depravity in theory, I must still struggle with it in practice. Sin, in myself or in others, always catches me off guard. Of course my children will sin against me....but wait! WHY, OH WHY, did my precious BABY just sin against me? Of course I am a sinner....but wait! I am such an IDIOT to sin in that way AGAIN! (After all, I *am* better than that, you know.)

All of this is a powerful reminder that parenting is for ME. Dealing with sinful behavior, both in myself and in my children, is clearly displaying my own weakness and Christ's sufficiency. My children are also an in-your-face, all-day-long picture of the amazing love the Father has for us. Just like my kids, I repeat the same sins over and over, yet He forgives. May I be like Him!

Finally, the middle section of this chapter deals with Moses and the Israelites as an example in parenting. This line of thinking was excellent, and timely for me as I was asked to write another baby shower devotional. With all credit going to Jay (THANKS!!!), I'd like to reprint the devotional here as a separate post, as it seems I get a few visitors every week looking for this type of material.

Everyday Talk, Chapter 4

Three months later.....(sorry!)

I found this chapter to be especially helpful for applying a specific scripture in a practical manner. The first concept is presented as a graphic and demonstrates how God has established parental authority. This is a visual breakdown of Ephesians 6:1-4. Our directions are, as the chapter title suggests, "Holy Directions" because they are "set apart." The directions of a Christian parent are fundamentally different from those of an unbelieving parent, primarily because a Christian has a higher authority behind him. "Do this because I told you to do it" gives way to "do this because I am your God-given authority and He has commanded that you obey me." (Now I will laugh every time I see one of those cheesy signs that say, "Because I'm the mother, that's why.") For a parent, this is both freeing and binding. Freedom comes from knowing we are leaning on God's higher authority, but the weight of our responsibility is all too clear. We must consider our commands before we throw them out there.

Next, we are asked to consider how we give directions. Do we expect to be obeyed? Of course! But I easily find myself slipping into some of the wrong examples that Jay gives. The encouragement here is to give direct, clear instruction in a pleasant tone of voice, expecting to be obeyed. So easy, so hard! I do love this quote: "God wants your children to obey you because it pleases Him and blesses them." Children MUST obey (Ephesians 6:1). In our home, I constantly tell my children that they cannot do this in their own strength, but that they can pray that God will assist them. We are then reminded that the only God-pleasing response is a pleasant affirmative (Philippians 2:14).

The author then introduces Proverbs 16:20-24, noting poetic structure that was likely employed. This was especially interesting to me and was expounded upon at the end of the chapter. This poetic structure would place special emphasis on vs. 22: "Understanding is a fountain of life to those who have it, but folly brings punishment to fools." Skipping ahead a bit, vs. 20-21 and 23-24 give the subject matter (listening to instruction and trusting in the LORD) and how this instruction should be delivered (with pleasant words, in a discerning manner). There is much more to be uncovered in these verses; this is just a taste of the riches found in God's word!

A few more needed insights to remember:

• Cooperation based on negotiation and mutual advantage is not obedience. Obedience is willing submission to authority.
  
  
• The parent is the one to blame when she does not see to it that she is obeyed the first time.
  
  
• Anger, manipulation, threats, and bribes will not get the job done.
  
  
• Pleasant words promote instruction!

Finally, Jay brings hope to those who despair from previous failures. He encourages us to turn to God for help, seeking His word to form our methods.

I will admit that I am not a big fan of questions at the end of chapters. I often find that the questions the author asks have typical "Sunday School" answers. But the questions at the end of this chapter were worth my time to reflect upon. In short:

1. Do I repeat commands?
2. Do I excuse disobedience?
3. What are my "hot buttons"?
4. What is the effect of angry words on my children....and on me?

More Rambling About Neutral Influences

My friend Christie recently commented on a blog post about Everyday Talk (ch. 1). After spending some time studying the scriptures she reminded me of, I started sketching. Now, over a week later, I am not sure if this even makes sense to anyone but myself, and I humbly acknowledge it's probably all mixed up and wrong. But here is what I am thinking:



(I think I am making WAY too much of this.)

I'll try to get Chapter Four typed out soon. This high-speed thing makes it MUUUUCH easier!!!

Baby Shower Devotion 2 - Psalm 23

Other Outlines
Baby Shower Devotion 1: Warning Against Idolatry
Baby Shower Devotion 3: Moses and Parenting

Baby Shower Devotion 2 - Psalm 23

I. Introduction - God’s word is rich! Just one chapter of scripture can bring encouragement and discipline throughout our entire life.

A. Childhood memorization of Psalm 23 (This is a popular memorization passage.)
B. Historical perspective of Psalm 23 (What do shepherds do? How do sheep act? What was the land like in that area?)
C. Psalm 23 for comfort in difficult circumstances (Frequently cited at funerals, this passage has brought much comfort to my own life in times of great physical suffering.)
D. Relating Psalm 23 to mothering (Just as the LORD is our shepherd, we are called to shepherd our children. We can gain insight from studying how God shepherds us.)

II. “The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want.”
Definition: want - need, lack, be without, fall short of

I will not fall short of my responsibilities in mothering if I look to Christ as the source of my strength (I Peter 1:3). My children will have their physical and spiritual needs met by Christ working through me, even when I sin or face physical challenges.

III. “He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters.”
Definition: makes - causes or compels (God causes the action of rest.)
Definition: still - not or hardly moving; calm and tranquil

A. I should make my children rest, both physically and in activities (BUT, avoid legalism!)
B. I should strive to feed my family well (BUT, avoid legalism!)
C. I should keep my children safe (BUT, avoid legalism!)

Ask your husband to help you know what is the "middle ground" for your family!

IV. “He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness for His name’s sake.”
Definition: restores - brings back to the original state by rebuilding or repairing; brings back to health; gives back to the original owner
Definition: leads - causes to go with one, especially by guiding or going in front of

A. I should help my children recognize their sin in order that God may bring them to repentance and restore their souls.
B. I should lead in righteousness by example, being honest about my own sin and modeling walking in righteousness.
C. All of this should be “for His name’s sake.” To God alone be the glory!

Everyday Talk - Chapter 3

Last week was very busy and this one promises to be even more so....but I will make an attempt to keep this going. My pattern is to read a chapter and then blog about it, because I know if I read ahead the blogging will never happen.

Backtracking just a bit, Jay *almost* had me convinced about the "no neutral influences" until last Sunday...when our interim pastor said the OPPOSITE from the pulpit. ;-) It was humorous when Anthony made that point in his sermon; Kevin started poking me and I had to try not to laugh! I can agree that there are no neutral MOTIVES, but I'm still on the fence about INFLUENCES. There are too many examples that I would personally consider to be neutral until right or wrong motives of an individual person are factored in.

Okay, on to chapter three. The basic idea of this brief chapter is that we do not listen to our children in a God-pleasing way much of the time. Although official "parentspeak" is not the norm around here, I do find myself passively listening or nodding. The encouragement to be more attentive to my children's words was appreciated. I especially liked this quote:

"It is much easier to speak first, thinking you will listen later. But often, speaking first means loosing the opportunity to listen at all."

Now, if you have smallish children, or a particularly talkative child, there are occasions in which the talking must be silenced! Children need to learn to please God with their words. Obviously I would stop child A from calling child B "stupidhead." But I would also encourage my children to consider their listener, and to refrain from babbling all day about things of no value.

Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself. Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others. ~ Philippians 2:3-4

Some examples:

If I have a friend over for coffee, she probably does not want to hear the plot of an entire read-aloud book, or a play-by-play of a recently watched Looney Tunes episode or two (or three or four or five). A few minutes of this is understandable, but some children can go on for a very, very long time. Trust me on this one.

If the baby just fell and halfway busted her front tooth out with much screaming and blood, I probably don't care that some unicorns have rainbow tails and can fly.

Controlling my tongue is a sin that I have struggled with my entire life, and my prayer is that I can lead my children to bring glory to God with their words. I also desire for them to grow in the areas of self-control and consideration for others (kindness, love). This of course does not mean that my child is not allowed to babble about whether Spider Man could beat up Darth Vader "in real life." It just means that I want him to have some consideration for his audience.

Granted, I must listen to know when to silence.

Prayer

Prayer has always been a weak area of my life, although the Spirit has been merciful to send help my way in the past few years! As I grew up, I never got beyond the thrice-daily mealtime prayers and supplication for ailing friends and family. When my friend Christi came to Unity, she began visiting my house every week for prayer time. After admitting to her that I wasn't even sure HOW to pray, she modeled God-pleasing prayer for me. It was a beautiful time that I will always cherish. (Christi, if you are reading this, I miss you!)

Then a few years ago, Kevin purchased "Valley of Vision" for me. I began praying these beautiful Puritan prayers, as well as praying through straight scripture. I studied the Lord's Prayer after an issue of Table Talk was devoted to that subject. And I also began writing down my own prayers, in short sentences, to focus my thoughts and make an attempt at giving God my best words.

This has become an important practice for me to teach my children. From the time they were very young, we prayed with them. Kevin prays over each child every single night when he tucks them into bed. After growing tired of my children's desire to chant "God is great" at every meal, I worked out this little bit:

Our Father in heaven,
Make Your name holy.
Bring us Your kingdom,
Provide for our needs.
Forgive all our sins,
Help us forgive others,
And when we are tested
Protect us from evil.
Amen.

But sometimes...more often than not...THEY DON'T WANT TO PRAY! If I tell them I will help them, they still shake their heads. The eldest is the instigator, I am certain. If this little one would be compliant, the "youngers" would follow. But I do not feel it is wise to say, "yes, you ARE praying!" Usually I do not make a big deal out of it and I pray instead, being careful to include something to the effect of, "God, help Katie and Owen WANT to talk to You."

Also, since we are on the subject, I will type out a prayer I wrote for my children based on the prayer of Christ in John 17. (Yes, yes, I know this isn't a parallel application, but I found it to be helpful in my own life since Christ was praying for those under His care.)

Holy Father,

You have given my children to me, and they belong to You. Help me to manifest (show plainly, clearly, obviously) Your name to them, to make Your name known to them, and to continue to make Your name known to them. May these little ones come to know You not only intellectually, but also with affection and commitment. Keep them in Your name that they may be one, and that by their unity the world will believe that Christ was sent by You.

Assist me in giving to these children Your words of truth. Cause them to receive these words and know in truth that You sent Christ. Sanctify (set apart for holy service) me for their sake, and sanctify them in truth, for Your word is truth.

Burden me to pray for my children. Keep them from evil, and impress upon my heart an urgency in guarding them.

May they have Christ's joy fulfilled in themselves. Amen.

Everyday Talk - Chapter 2

The first thing addressed in this chapter, without actually using this specific phrase, is total depravity as applies to children. I have no problem with this. HAVE YOU READ MY BLOG? It seems some days that my children are out to prove this doctrine single-handedly.

So, moving along, it is mentioned that some parents can believe we are all born sinners and as a result move in the entirely opposite direction. These parents are rather cynical about any confession their child makes, taking the "wait and see" approach. As I thought about this, I wondered...does it matter if we, the parent, have absolute assurance of our child's salvation? This probably sounds crazy, but it seems that my responsibility to my child does not change after effectual calling. The gospel is not just for one moment in time. It is life! Every day! I need that beautiful gospel now just as much as I did the hour I first believed. Don't get me wrong - it would be nice to "know." Actually, it's a bit of a necessity for us Baptiterians. But my responsibility to point my children to Christ as the relief from the misery of sin, both in His perfect life and His atoning death, is the same on either side of conversion.

With that in mind, what a blessing to see the gospel simply presented within these pages. One can never know who might pick up this book, right? I also LOVE the section about God providing faith, and the question, "What do your children think the gospel is?" In my heart and mind I know all of these things, but my prayer is that I will put it into practice by consistance in discipline and instruction. Kevin and I are both fairly calm people (I think I've seen Kevin angry ONCE....EVER....), but I do occasionally deal with internal anger or irritation stemming from selfishness.

Next, can I delight in my children when they have poor behavior? Whew! That's a tough one. I do still love them, but I'll have to think about DELIGHTING in them. (It does provide for some humorous blogging on occasion.)

I believe that legalistic, works-based thinking is as natural as breathing, even after conversion. I do it all the time. "Why can't I stop running my mouth about things that aren't even my business?" I am so proud that I actually believe I'm "better than that." In reality, I am a wicked, sinful woman and I should be running to Christ!

Lastly, I have some thoughts on prayer, but they must wait for another post. The dishes are calling...

Everyday Talk - Finishing Chapter 1

(I am quickly realizing that this excersize is much more helpful for myself than for "The Author," aka "Columbo," aka "my buddy Jay.")

First, a couple of thoughts from the comments on chapter 1:

I agree completely with the conclusions drawn from the two questions. Yes, we would certainly act differently if Christ were physically present in our homes every day. And yes, the scripture teaches that God is with us in a very real way NOW. What we should be asking is this: What is the MOTIVE behind how I spend time with my children each day and the activities I choose for them?

There are a few specific influences listed in chapter 1 to get the reader started in evaluating their children's daily activities. "Playing with friends" is one, for example. This could easily fall into the negative OR postive category, depending on the choice of the playmates. So some influences have the potential to be postive OR negative. But what about another example, "riding the bus"? Just riding the bus seems...neutral. Unless, of course, you consider WHO the child is riding beside. (There are actually some of us who think it is ridiculous to wake a four-year-old at 5:30 to catch the bus at 6:20, so they can ride around for an hour, sitting next to whomever they choose, or whoever chooses to sit beside them.)

Kevin pointed out physical necessities at possible neutral influences, but then there is the whole "so whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God." (1 Corinthians 10:31)

All that being said...do you think it is possible to draw every single thing in our lives to point towards Christ, every moment of every day, at least while we are still alive in this fallen creation? What about folding the laundry? What about riding your bike? WHAT ABOUT WORD TWIST?!?! (LOL!)

Okay, enough of chapter 1. On to chapter 2!

Everyday Talk by John A. Younts - Chapter 1

I’d like to spend a bit of time blogging through a book I am currently reading. This is not really a book review, as others much wiser than I have already taken care of that sort of thing. My attempts at sharing my thoughts are for the possible small benefit to the kind person who gave me this book, as well as for my hoards of regular readers. ;-) Apologies in advance for the sporadic nature of my posting; my crazy life often gets in the way of blogging.

Chapter 1 - Stupid Rain

Any parenting book worth its salt will, at some point, quote the Shema from Deuteronomy 6. This book wastes no time! I especially appreciated the reminder of context; this command was given at the brink of the Israelites entering the Promised Land. God was revealing the seriousness of remembering Him, reverencing Him, and teaching the next generation to do the same.

From the next section I gleaned some important questions to be asking myself:

1. What is so important to me that I think about it all day?
2. What do I talk about NOW?
3. Do I realize that I am already communicating to my children where my priorities lie by what I talk about and do all day?

On a personal note, what do my children observe when God is calling me to “love the unlovely?” Or how about my selfish demands of “me time?” Are my children an interruption of my To Do list (because we know how important it is to keep the house sparkling clean at ALL TIMES)? Do I act differently when others (not immediate family) are around to observe my words and actions?

When I first read the “stupid rain” conversation, the timing couldn’t have been better. I had been looking forward to a particular event for weeks, and our babysitter backed out at the last minute. It was a fabulous pity-party! I moped out to check the mail and this book was sitting in the mailbox. Admittedly, it perked my spirits a bit to get a gift….until I read the first few pages! After all, it was ultimately God’s fault that we had no sitter, right? My response was sending a loud, clear signal, not only to my children, but to my husband as well. I was placing my joy in something temporal.

Now for a bit of uncertainty. The author makes several references to Satan in this chapter. Acknowledging my probable lack of understanding regarding Satan, I feel that he need not waste his time on me. I do a fantastic job of sinning without any help from Satan. Even in my worst trials I have never felt oppressed enough to say that I was under attack from Satan; my oppression came from my own sin. Again, I am likely showing my ignorance regarding supernatural issues.

How beautiful that scripture compares the godly instruction of parents to “a garland to grace your head and a chain to adorn your neck” (Proverbs 1:9)! This insight was meaningful to me in how I approach discipline and instruction. Presentation affects reception…how true!

My favorite quote in this chapter: “If you don’t spend time thinking about God, you won’t have much to say about God.”

(Side note that I observed at this point in my reading - I really like the author’s use of several translations of scripture. This gives me a fuller picture of the intent of the original writer.)

Finally, the author talks about the influences that press upon our children each day. I am blessed to say that I have MUCH influence in the lives of my children; I stay home with them, educate them, play with them, etc. But WOW! What a responsibility!

Also, I am not 100% convinced that there are no “neutral influences.” It seems that for this to be true, we would have to assign spiritual meaning to every single thing that happens all day. Granted, some things that I might consider neutral could be used in a positive way, such as riding in the van. We could ride in silence, which to me would be neutral. We could argue the whole time, which would be negative. Or we could talk about what we studied that morning in the book of Ruth, which would be positive.

But no neutral influences? And, could something that is positive for one family be negative for another (and no, I am not advocating relativism!)? For example, take this list of potential influences:

Watching an ungodly TV program for a lengthy amount of time
Watching an ungodly TV program for a short amount of time
Watching an educational TV program for a lengthy amount of time
Watching an educational TV program for a short amount of time
Watching a “spiritual” TV program (Veggie Tales? LOL!) for a lengthy amount of time
Watching a “spiritual” TV program for a short amount of time
Watching Teletubbies or Yo Gabba Gabba (TOTALLY MINDLESS) for a lengthy amount of time (this could land you in a mental institution, people)
Watching Teletubbies or Yo Gabba Gabba for a short amount of time (still not recommended!)
Not having a TV at all in your home

Can you sort these into positive and negative? Can you do this for all of your friends’ families, as well?

Okay, I realize that I am WAAAAY overanalyzing this, but my crazy brain works that way. Regardless of whether or not an influence can be neutral, this chapter was valuable for providing me with tools of evaluation in my parenting, as well as fodder for “Jenny’s Crazy Theology.”

Hopefully I will have time to get rolling on the next chapter very soon.

Old Red

My friend Shannon emailed me this week to tell me that their family dog had died. Old Red's story is pretty incredible. Shaun and Shannon got Red when they still lived in Tennessee. The dog made the move with their family to Alabama, and by God's gracious providence, he eventually made the move with them back north to Mississippi. Shannon has given me permission to share this email from January 2nd, 2003.

Hi you guys,

This is a little long, but it really happened to our family and I'm still in awe over it. I couldn't wait to share it with you.

I may or may not have mentioned to you that our dog, Red, ran away about a week before Christmas (approx. Dec. 12). We drove around the neighborhood looking for him, but to no avail. Since he still had not come home by December 20 (the day we had to leave to come home for Christmas), we guessed we wouldn't see him again.

We returned to Mobile Dec. 26, but Red still had not come home. We kept hoping that he'd return, but he didn't. So we had decided that he probably wasn't coming back. The kids and I were sadden by the loss of our dog, so we started thinking about getting a new puppy.

January 1, 2003 (my birthday) we were trying to decide what to do to sort of celebrate the day, when Shaun suggested that we go look for a puppy. I sort of brushed off the idea at first, because I had planned to give Red a couple more weeks to return. But then I decided that it was highly unlikely that he was coming back, so I agreed with my husband and suggested that we pick up a newspaper and check the classified ads for puppies for sale.

We made three phone calls as we were driving around and starting making appointments to see the puppies that were available. There was an ad for Jack Russell Terriers that peaked our interest, so we made a call to go see the puppies. It turned out to be the nearest location to us, (probably 5 miles from our house), so we decided to go there first.

The man who owned the puppies brought them outside for us to see. They were four of the cutest little puppies and we had almost decided that we wanted one of them. Then Seth, our oldest son, mentioned to the man that our dog had run away.

The man asked what the dog looked like, and I described Red to him. He told us that it sounded just like a dog he had picked up that had been hit by a car on Airport Road. He had taken the dog to the emergency vet. He said the dog had been hurt pretty badly, but he thought it had survived. He knew the lady who had taken the dog home, and he told us how to get there. We thanked the man and went to see if by chance the dog was Red.

Indeed, it was! We were so thankful that strangers had been so kind to him.

We were so glad to have Red back, but more than that, it was a great opportunity to share our faith in our Awesome God with our children. It was an opportunity to share how He cares about the things that are important to us, and that He does intervene in our daily lives. He is constantly at work around us.

Think about it. What were the chances that (1) we would decide to go look for puppies that day, and (2) we would pick an ad for Jack Russell Terriors that would take us to the man who transported Red to the emergency vet.

Needless to say we didn't buy a puppy, but we are glad to have our Red home again.

Happy New Year!

Grace & Peace,

Shannon

Sunday Morning Phone Call

Anyone who has ever served as church leadership knows about Sunday morning phone calls. They are not something you look forward to.

Church pianist: "We have the flu..."

Nursery worker: "I forgot to get a replacement for today..."

Pastor: (inaudible due to laryngitis)

Kevin and I have experienced all of these at one time or another. So when the phone rang last Sunday morning, I answered it less than enthusiastically - until I found out who it was and why they were calling.

Rewind a bit to over two years ago. The property just past Unity sold to a truck driver named Joe. Joe had a little boy who was almost the exact same age as Owen (9-10 months), and Joe had just been through an awful divorce. He told us that he had a sister in Florida named Abby who urged him to visit Unity. She was a homeschooling mom of seven and attended a Reformed Presbyterian church.

Joe attended off and on. We sent clothes and food for him and his son often. I would occasionally receive phone calls from Joe, who understandably had many parenting questions. A few times Kevin also ended up chatting with him, encouraging him to find relief from his difficult circumstances in Christ alone. It was apparent that Joe did not know Christ, but we prayed for him. With Kevin's permission, I gave Joe the NIV Bible that Kevin had bought me a year or so into our marriage. My name was even engraved on the front. But I had moved on to the (in?)famous Reformation Study Bible in ESV and was happy to share. I practically wrote a novel in the front of the Bible and gave it to Joe.

Shortly after, Joe disappeared and we didn't hear from him again. Until...

His sister called me last Sunday! I could tell that the lady on the other end of the line was a bit hesitant. She explained who she was and told me that Joe had just gone through another difficult time and had asked her to take his son. Abby said that at first she said no. After all, she had seven children of her own! But in her words, God "changed her heart" and the little one has been "nothing but a joy to their entire family."

Abby went on to tell me the best part - Joe has recently repented and has accepted Christ as Lord of his life! He has apparently been wearing out John Piper CDs to the point of memorizing them - a by-product of the many hours a trucker spends on the road. The boy is still with Abby, and Joe is renting out his house beside the church, spending time with his son in Florida on his days off.

The most touching thing for me was the reason Abby decided to call me - a complete stranger. She knows NOTHING about me; I could be in some snake-handling Calvin cult. (Just go to Wikipedia, type in "snake handling," and click on the comments where I stated my opinion two years ago about THAT, lol!) But she called me because she read the note. She looked in his Bible, the one with my name on the front. The nice one my sweet husband gave me for Christmas when we were young and broke. And she read the note. Then she found my number, because Joe had written it down so he could ask things like "do I need to brush his teeth three times a day" and "how much formula should he be drinking?" And she called me.

For that, I give thanks. Soli Deo Gloria!

And if you think of it, pray for Joe and his son.

Baby Shower Devotion 1 - Warning Against Idolatry

Other Outlines
Baby Shower Devotion 2: Psalm 23
Baby Shower Devotion 3: Moses and Parenting

Last week my friend Mary made the mistake of asking me to "say a few words" at a double baby shower at Unity. Okay, here is what I do, people. I sing. I can sing in front of people all day and never be nervous. And although it has been a long time to serve in this area outside my own home, I teach kids stuff like Children's Choir and Bible Drill.

My experience in speaking to anyone over the age of twelve is limited and slightly out of my comfort zone. But I swallowed my uncomfortableness and started studying.

For three days.

Did I mention that I am CDO? (That's OCD, but you have to have it in alphabetical order.)

After three days, I had enough material to teach a six-week study on motherhood. Somehow I knew this wasn't what Mary had in mind, so I had to cut some stuff. I tried to focus on what would have been the most beneficial to ME, SPIRITUALLY, as a new mom. Then I typed out a nifty outline and made copies for everyone.

Overall, it was fine. (Under 20 minutes! They had to cancel the shower games because it was getting late!) But as Kevin said in retrospect, "They probably expected to open cute pink outfits and eat cake, not get a lesson on idolatry." He was not saying that I shouldn't have done it, just trying to give me something to consider for later.

Assuming that I'll be asked again! *giggle*

So if you need a lesson on baby idolatry, check out the outline below. I'm open for booking and don't charge very much. ;-)

New Babies: Blessing, Warning, and Encouragement

I. Babies are a Blessing!

Psalm 127:3-5
Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, the fruit of the womb a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one’s youth. Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them! He shall not be put to shame when he speaks with his enemies in the gate.

II. Warning Against Idolatry: “Our hearts are idol factories.”

A. Graven Images
B. “Bad” Idols (materialism, vanity, etc.)
C. “Good” Idols (gifts from God that twist into idols - especially firstborn children!)

(Can you think of times when you idolized your children?)

III. Encouragement in Difficult Times (James 1:2-3; 1 Peter 1:6-7)

(When do we depend on God the most? What causes us to grow?)

A. Labor
1. Painful labor is part of the curse that resulted from the Fall (Genesis 3:16).
2. God is making all things new, but this has not yet been completed (Romans 8:18-23).
3. God has promised that He will be with us (Deuteronomy 31:8), and He has given us means to bear the pain (mediating on scripture and music, prayer, and your HUSBAND!)

(Do you have a testimony of God’s peace and mercy during your labor?)

B. Sleeplessness
1. Feeding your baby in the wee hours of dawn can be a special bonding time.
2. This is your first baby, so get a nap during the day when they do. Housework can wait!
3. GET SOME HUMILITY AND ASK FOR HELP! It is a blessing for others to help you.

(Do you have a special FOND memory of the “psycho-tired” days? How did others minister to you after the birth of a child?)

C. Parenting Advice
1. God’s wisdom is perfect (James 3:17). Man’s wisdom is flawed by sin (Proverbs 14:12). Praise God for wise men and woman who have written encouragement, but be careful to not place them on the level of scripture.
2. Although we can’t give Gary Ezzo a call at two in the morning, we can pray to the King of the Universe (James 1:5)!
3. God has graciously surrounded us all with godly help. Seek the advice of your husband first. You can also ask an older (not necessarily OLD!), godly woman for her wisdom and insight. (Ephesians 5:23; Titus 2:3-4)

(Have you tried to legalistically follow a human plan for raising your child? Or have you been blessed by the wisdom of your husband or a Titus 2 woman?)

From Valley of Vision:

Let those that are united to me in tender ties be precious in thy sight and devoted to thy glory. Sanctify and prosper my domestic devotion, instruction, discipline, example, that my house may be a nursery for heaven…enriched with the trees of righteousness of thy planting, for thy glory.

Happy Reformation Day!

THE REFORMATION POLKA
by Richard Gebel
(Sung to the tune of Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious)

When I was just ein junger Mann I studied canon law;
While Erfurt was a challenge, it was just to please my Pa.
Then came the storm, the lightning struck,
I called upon Saint Anne,
I shaved my head, I took my vows, an Augustinian! Oh...

Chorus:
Papal bulls, indulgences, and transubstantiation!
Speak your mind against them and face excommunication!
Nail your theses to the door, let's start a Reformation!
Papal bulls, indulgences, and transubstantiation!

When Tetzel came near Wittenberg, Saint Peter's profits soared,
I wrote a little notice for the All Saints' Bull'tin board:
"You cannot purchase merits, for we're justified by grace!
Here's 95 more reasons, Brother Tetzel, in your face!" Oh...

Chorus:
Papal bulls, indulgences, and transubstantiation!
Speak your mind against them and face excommunication!
Nail your theses to the door, let's start a Reformation!
Papal bulls, indulgences, and transubstantiation!

They loved my tracts, adored my wit, all were exempleror;
The Pope, however, hauled me up before the Emperor.
"Are these your books? Do you recant?" King Charles did demand,
"I will not change my Diet, Sir, God help me here I stand!" Oh...

Chorus:
Papal bulls, indulgences, and transubstantiation!
Speak your mind against them and face excommunication!
Nail your theses to the door, let's start a Reformation!
Papal bulls, indulgences, and transubstantiation!

Duke Frederick took the Wise approach, responding to my words,
By knighting "George" as hostage in the Kingdom of the Birds.
Use Brother Martin's model if the languages you seek,
Stay locked inside a castle with your Hebrew and your Greek! Oh...

Chorus:
Papal bulls, indulgences, and transubstantiation!
Speak your mind against them and face excommunication!
Nail your theses to the door, let's start a Reformation!
Papal bulls, indulgences, and transubstantiation!

Let's raise our steins and Concord Books
While gathered in this place,
And spread the word that 'catholic' is spelled with lower case;
The Word remains unfettered when the Spirit gets his chance,
So come on, Katie, drop your lute, and join us in our dance! Oh...

Chorus:
Papal bulls, indulgences, and transubstantiation!
Speak your mind against them and face excommunication!
Nail your theses to the door, let's start a Reformation!
Papal bulls, indulgences, and transubstantiation!

When Worship Becomes Consumerism

Mystery Worshipper

This Wall Street Journal article blows my mind. If you want to be sure that your pre-worship lattes are hot enough and that your band's lead singer doesn't have pitch problems, just hire someone. For $1,500.

Perhaps a better idea would be for the church body to have a servant's heart and take the initiative to change the light bulbs themselves. Also, when visitors are in attendance and the church is less than hospitable, shouldn't the leadership should do some evaluation and admonition themselves? It would save them $1,500. (Did I mention that this guy charges $1,500?)

The part that bugged me the most was that this former pastor "had a cover story just in case..." The last time I checked, God hates a lying tongue.

HT: Justin Taylor

Kevin as My Example

About a month ago I was feeling discontent. For those not in the know, caring for small children and homeschooling is monotonous:

Wake up
Make bed
Fix Kevin breakfast
Get dressed
"Quiet" time (not usually quiet!)
Herd the children (get them dressed, hair, beds, etc.)
Breakfast and children's Bible time
Daily chores (dishes, trash, laundry, thaw dinner)
School
Lunch
Finish school
Weekly chores (bulletin, groceries, bills, etc.)
Dinner
Clean kitchen
Hang out with Kevin
Bed

I can type this from memory because it's what I do. Every day. Even on the weekends, I have to do the majority of these things to manage my household. The main variations of this include cleaning up the four drink spills that Owen creates at every meal, and Shouting out those unpleasant stains that come from Audrey eating too many grapes. So sometimes I get discouraged.

When I get discouraged, I look to Christ. Pray. Read God's word. But this time I also needed something tangible, so I prayed for just that! And God answered me by directing my attention to Kevin.

My husband is a faithful, dependable person. He goes to his workplace every day. He isn't exactly figuring statistics for the NFL (his dream job), but he never complains. He leaves, he does tuition reimbursements and service awards, he comes home, and he declares that it was a good day. What a godly example for me to follow!

This month (notice this is a monthly problem? HAHAH!!!!!), I need an example in "Keeping My Mouth Shut So Nothing Sinful Will Fly Out Of It Before I Have A Chance To Choke It Back Down." Some of you know what I am talking about. If this is you, I suggest you talk to Kevin. He excells in this area as well. Of course, he CLAIMS that he isn't thinking of anything at all, so there isn't anything to fly out...but I know better. ;)

Be imitators of me, as I am of Christ. ~ I Corinthians 11:1