Adventures in Homemaking

Who says it's boring to be a stay-at-home mom? Where else can you see...

...a boy sleeping in his pillowcase?


...exploded potatoes (on July 4th, no less; I thought the neighbors had some incredible fireworks!)?


...a for-real shiner (he lost a fight with the side of the swimming pool)?


...a MATER cake (Happy Birthday, my big 4-year-old!)?


...kids making homemade ice-cream, and...


...eating it?


...homemade yogurt dripping whey over a sink (looks nasty but it tasted great)?


...a yogurt-eating dinosaur?


And now for a couple of pics from the Navy Lake fireworks show. Audrey and "Grandma #3," Ms. Teri:


Daddy and Audie


Daddy and Katie

2009 Sonlight Catalog

Look who made page 135!

Bananas and Catechisms

In honor of my new high-speed life, I would like to submit a few videos!

This is a typical breakfast at Casa Hinton (although I usually ask the questions). By his response to "Who were our first parents?", I think Owen has been watching a little too much WALL-E.

Don't Touch the Yogurt

And for all those who watched the catechism video and thought my kids are perfect angels, I give you the OTHER SIDE of breakfast.

Can I get some tots with that?

Every day after lunch, Katie and Owen go with me to put Audrey down for a nap. We sing her two bedtime songs: "Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing" (Owen's favorite) followed by "Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star" (Audrey's favorite). Every time we sing that last line, "how I wonder what you are," she pulls her fingers out of her mouth and sings, "Up-a bubba bubba bye" to get us to sing the last half again. This can go on for SOME TIME, as all three of my children are masters of putting sleep off for as long as possible.

But I love the kids' version of "Come Thou Fount."

Katie - "Let Thy goodness like a feather bind my wandring heart to Thee."

Owen - "Teach me some mewodious Sonic, sung by fwaming tongues above."

Catching Up, Part 2

Katie has a very keen sense of smell.



I promise I'm not playing favorites; Owen just does funny stuff all the time! Just like his Daddy, that boy. First, a cute one:



Next....Owen thinks he's a guitar!



And I just had to include this one. It is funny on it's own, but even funnier when you know the context. Owen got NEW SHOES. LOL!



I love this one because it is so typical! She is "screamy," but sweet.

Odds and Ends

Katie had to write a persuasive letter for her Language Arts. She had to decide who she wanted to persuade, what she wanted to persuade them to do, and make an appeal to both emotion and logic. Here is what she settled on. She wanted to persuade Kevin to let her STAY with Grandma. Meaning, live with her. Her appeal to emotion included the fact that she loves Grandma and has fun with her. Of course this is logical, because she promised that she would obey and not ask to go shopping. Best of all, she told Kevin, "You and Mama can go on lots of dates."

After she wrote the letter, she was watching Looney Tunes and informed me that Michagan J. Frog is very persuasive. (Michagan J. is the singing frog who always stops performing when put in front of an audience.) After all, he sings, "So bay-be, come on, and tell me I'm your oooooowwwwnnnn!" Come ON! Tell me I'm your own!

And in other news, we had a crazy squirrel try to get into the house last week. He kept trying to jump through the French doors. Then he came back a couple of hours later and did it again. Weird!

Finally, in case you didn't know, Wendy is McDonald's wife.

Turtles, Chicks, and School Buses!

Last night we had a friend over for dinner. Her husband is in Nigeria on a mission trip and we thought she could use the diversion. For dessert we had Edwards' Turtle Pie. YUM! Owen's eyes lit up like a Christmas tree when he saw it...until his daddy had to go and ruin it for him.

"Owen, this is Turtle Pie. It has turtles in it. See? Those are the shells. And there's the guts."

Owey wouldn't touch it. Kevin laughed a diabolical laugh and informed us that his plan had worked. More for him!

Later, Kevin felt guilty and tried to get Owen to eat some of it. The boy kept looking at the side of it, asking, "Is dem duh tuttle guts?"

Mean ol' daddy. Of course I can't say much.

Tonight Katie asked, "Mama, why are there two kinds of chicken eggs? You know, one has some egg in it we eat, and the other has a baby chick."

I so did NOT want to go into the whole fertilization thing so I just told her, "Well, if you want a chick, you leave the egg under the mama hen so she can keep it warm. And if you want an egg to eat, you take it out from under her and put it in the refrigerator."

Bad answer. I realized this about the time Katie's bottom lip started trembling. Her eyes filled with tears...."You mean we EAT THE BABY CHICKS?!??!?!"

Niiiiice.

On a more random note, it takes just about eight minutes to get from my house to Katie's art class. Two minutes of that is spent on my street. When I turn onto the main road into town, it's usually about 2:50 in the afternoon. Want to guess how many school buses we pass during the next six minutes?

TWENTY FOUR.

Amazing. I could say a lot more about this but will skip it in leu of going to hang out with Kevin.

Girl Talk

I usually do not lack for funny stories about Owen. He is a fountain of perpetual amusement. He did say something funny a couple of days ago but I didn't write it down and it just flew out of my head. So tonight I'll just have some "girl talk."

Our homeschool group had a Presidential Hall of Fame and Election Day. My job was to make ballots. And like a good citizen, I made sure that our ballots listed any candidate who made the national ticket. I showed my finished results to Katie:

"Look, here are all the people running for president. Tomorrow you will get to decide who you think should lead us and cast your vote. Do you know who you would like to vote for?"

"I'm voting for Bob Barr because he has two B names."

"Um, okay. Bob Barr is the Libertarian candidate. Do you want to know what he believes?"

"No, I just like his two B's."

True to form, when Katie went in to vote she did not even let Teresa finish explaining before she had made a big "X" for Bob.



For several weeks, Katie has been ending many of her sentences with "....that is." Today she was telling me about something and said, "...and it was red. Red like a rose, that is. Mama? Why do some people say, 'that is' all the time?" I don't know, girl. You tell me!

One last Katie story. I am not sure what to do with this because it is really weird. Katie "sees" different keys (music) as colors. She told Kevin that he was playing a song in yellow and that she wanted it in red. Kevin and I rolled our eyes at each other...until she was turned away from the guitar and could fairly accurately tell us which "color" Kevin was playing. (If anyone has heard of this, I'd like to hear about it!)

And finally, Audrey. She just roams around the house all day, seeking what she may destroy. She pulls clothes from drawers, dishes from cabinets, books from shelves - all in a matter of ten minutes!

Today she was SO funny. During breakfast we go over the catechism. Katie is on a question somewhere in the 60's. Owen is closing in on 20. Audrey? Well, she knows the first one! If you ask her, "Audrey, who made you?" she answers, "Gaaaaah!" This morning I pushed it a bit further. "Audrey, what else did God make?" Her answer? She looked very serious, straight into my eyes, and said, "Grablah plamba blab." I went on to the next question and she responded straightfaced with more gibberish. Katie and Owen were laughing so hard! Here is a picture of Audrey with a bad hair day. (I suppose I need to do something about her mullet sometime, huh?)

The Tastiest Planet and Other Adventures

Aggravation!

Here is a common sight on a Friday night at Casa Hinton. After a sing-along accompanied by both guitar and bass and multiple bedtime stories for the little ones, it is time for a bit of fun. It's about 10:00 and the coffee is brewing. The smell of delicious (previously frozen) peach cobbler lingers in the air. Friends Roger and Elisabeth now sit with Kevin and me at our homey kitchen table. Roger says....."Kill her!"

WHAT?!?! No, we are not into some new cult. We are playing Aggravation, known to some as Texas Hot Seat. The game board was a wedding gift from my grandpa. The main problem is that Elisabeth and I have not been "providentially blessed." I might dare to use the term "unlucky" for something this serious. I can't even keep track anymore....the guys probably lead by over twenty games.

So, Elisabeth, I have come up with a possible solution. I am teaching Katie and Owen to play. We can probably cheat our way into a win without them even knowing. Bwahaha!!! Seriously, though, the kids really like this game. I counted it as school, since it involves lots of counting and logic. And dice rolling. All good Baptists know how to cast lots, right? (R and E, you can easily see Owen's logic...bring 'em ALL out at once!)



Growing Pains...for ME

Audrey has been walking for about three or four weeks now. She immediately followed this up with climbing the bookshelf, climbing up on the kitchen table, throwing Katie's socks in the trash, playing in the toilet, and this:



But I don't want to take a nap!

(I wonder if Owen will still be sleeping with Spot dog when he's married?)



Pee B and J

Owen woke up on Tuesday, walked into the living room, and announced the following: "Fust I'm gonna get cwose on, den eat wunch, den go spen da night at Gwanma's house." He then proceeded to dress himself. I went to get Audrey up and dressed. When I came back he was standing in his Little Tykes chair in a puddle of pee, eating a heel of bread. He had the knife, peanut butter, and jelly out for making his "wunch." After his bath he insisted on the sandwich, so after chanting my current mantra of "choose your battles" I told him to go for it. Here he is licking the peanut butter, wet hair and all.



Eating Mercury

Katie took almost an hour to help me make gray salt dough and then sculpt her model of Mercury. Audrey took less than two minutes to climb on the table and make a crater of her own. Mmmmm.....Salty Mercury. (Kevin, there's a Simpsons reference for ya!)

Take Me To the Fair, Part One

We ended up taking two trips to the Mid-South Fair this year. This was the last year for the fair to be held in Midtown Memphis. For me, this meant bidding farewell to old childhood memories, as well as making a few new ones for my own children.

Our first visit was a gig, in a very loose sense of the term. Susan, one of our church pianists/keyboardists, hooked our praise team up to play in the Creative Arts Building. Kevin and I were amused when Cindy, our fair contact, refered to Sue as our "Promoter." Very funny.

We left in two mini-vans because bands have to haul stuff. Pretty appropriate for our gang, though - that's how we roll. After a wrong turn and plenty of lighthearted banter, we made it to the parking lot and waited on Cindy to show up on her golf cart.

You may never see Todd driving one of these babies again, so enjoy. He looks thrilled, doesn't he?



Roger thought he was cute to sit on our luggage rack with his legs hanging over the back, so Kevin turned on the rear washer/wipers. This is Roger venting his wrath.



The gig itself went well after a bit of trial-and-error with the sound system. Most of our fans were in attendance - Mom, Trish, Katie, Elisabeth, Roger's parents, Allison and her dad. All in all, a great time.

A week or so later, Kevin and I returned with the kids. Mom came along, too, although we couldn't persuade her to ride anything. At least she got her caramel apple, and even tried funnel cake...FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER! (I can't believe that.)

Kevin and Owen on "The Bee Ride"



Katie and Mama Stuck in the Maze

This is just one funny thing to watch. Kids just run smack into the glass constantly. I can't say much for myself, though; I came out right behind the guy who sits at the front and makes sure you are tall enough, instead of upstairs!



Hi, Grandma! (Don't be mad that I put you on here!)

Take Me To the Fair, Part Two

My kids are fearless. They rode everything they were tall enough to ride. Katie even went with Kevin and me on the double log ride and a mid-sized roller coaster! Here she is enjoying what I would call the "Whiplash Cars."



Owen's favorite, by far, was one of those rides with the rope bridges, obstacles, and the big slide at the end. He went on it almost TWENTY times. Mom and I just sat on the bench and rested while he played and Kevin took Katie on some bigger rides. Here is my boy, and this is his Fierce Sliding Face:



And what's a good fair without some totally unhealthy fair food? Corn on the cob, dripping with butter, and a big ol' slice of pepperoni pizza:





When it was time to go, I got an extra-special surprise....

In the days of my own childhood, we only went to the fair a handful of times. But we always went with our friends Mr. Harold, "Miss" Dianne, and their boys. I have such fond memories of riding all the rides and can still hear echoes of the adults' conversation. All day long I had a flood of memories wash over me. As we sat on the bench waiting on Kevin to bring a funnel cake - our last hurrah - who should I spot but Mr. Harold? He probably thought I was crazy to chase him down, but I just had to say hello. It was such a fitting end to the night, and to the Midtown Edition of the Mid-South Fair!

Random Homeschooling Pictures

Little Bookworm


Fairy Ring


"Who cares that the magnifying glass melts the chocolate. Just give us the chocolate!" (AKA Science for the Homeschool)





Katie and Eleanor at Swim Class

This and That

I warned you all that I post in spurts. Kevin is off work tomorrow so we can take Katie and Owen to the Mid-South Fair. So I am just staying up WAY too late and posting to my heart's content! I'm sure the kids will make me pay when they get up earlier than usual tomorrow. (That's how they roll.)

Congratulations to my friend Teresa S., who tried my grocery tips and saved over $90 at Kroger last week. Her prize is a package of Soleil disposable razors that I got for $1.99, since Teresa had some issues with redeeming the combination of manufacturer and store coupons for said razors at the Millington Walgreens (should have gone to Atoka!).

It was so cloudy last Friday that Katie informed me that it was a "dimsal day." Meanwhile, Owen announced that "Gran-ma is gonna haf a bay-be." When I asked him if it was in her tummy, he said, "Almost!"

Unity's basketball team won last week. Here's a pic of Kevin leading the halftime devotional. I think he spoke on Supralapsarianism vs. Infralapsarianism. (Just kidding!)



Seriously, the devotional was about loving your wives. Chris looks mighty interested. Todd looks....well, like he has a light saber sticking out of his scalp.



Chris in action....



....and John.



Ridin' the pines. And checkin' the odor.



Post-game commentary. For the record, Jason just wanted to go eat!



(Yeah, I am dangerous with this Photoshop thing....time for BED!)

Be careful what you ask for.

For all of you who are amazed at my posting spree, this is what my brain is like. I think of all these things I want to put on here but I have to keep pushing them back because I don't have the time to type them out. Then my brain fills up and just spills over. Okay, so maybe it isn't that dramatic. But one last post for today.

There are five people who live in this house. Four of them use the toilet. But only one of them changes the toilet paper. So it is a good thing that the one person who changes it is vigilant.

However, it seems ironically unfair that although I am that one person, I got stuck on the toilet with no paper last Saturday. Kevin was home. I thought I'd be cute, so I yelled, "FAMILY!!! I need some toilet paper!!!"

Katie went to the other bathroom and brought me....one square. Her generosity is so evident, even at her tender age. (Thankfully, her daddy was behind her with a roll. And he didn't even peek in, although he threatened the camera.)

Now, Owen wipes his own bottom. Katie is too much of a perfectionist. This fact is one of my current pet peeves. So, to be cute, I said, "Katie! Thanks for this toilet paper! Do you want to come wipe my bottom?" She responded with a characteristic "EEEEEWWWWWW!!!! No way!"

From the living room I could hear fast little footsteps, and Owen's helpful cry. "I will, Mommy! I wipe you booty!!!"

I love that boy. He makes me laugh!

Occupying Toddlers While Trying to Homeschool

(I've had a couple of people inquire about the article I had published. This is the version I have saved in email, before the editor took care of my wordiness.)

The best way I have found to occupy busy toddlers is to include them! This means you must plan for your toddler just as you plan for your school children. Jot down a list of things your little one can do in the areas of taking care of himself, chores, and school. Even play time can have a little structure. Also, never underestimate what a young child can do. They will certainly surprise you if you spend some time instructing and training them.

In our home, we have a chart on the refrigerator with a small picture of each task in the order I would like for them to be done each day. You can use your own digital pictures in a Word document or just cut and paste from a magazine. Above each picture is a simple description; for example, "Brush your teeth!" has a picture of a little girl brushing away. After about a week of walking my children through the list they can do it by themselves, with my five-year-old daughter helping my two-year-old son just a bit. Meanwhile, I can nurse my baby or get breakfast ready.

For personal care, our list includes going potty (my son is potty training), getting dressed, putting away PJs, combing hair, and eating breakfast, which is when I teach the children from the Bible. Our Bible time includes a "hymn of the week" and learning the Apostle's Creed; more on that below.

During chores, my children make their own beds. No, they do not do it perfectly, but they do their best! Then they can pick two chores each from a list of four. The first chore is emptying the bathroom trashes into the kitchen trash every day, even if they are not full (put a rubber band around the liner so only the trash dumps out). Next, I bought a Dustbuster for cleaning crumbs from under the table each morning, and for cleaning up hair from the bathroom floor. Two-year-old boys generally LOVE noisy chores like this one! The other two chores are sorting silverware from the dishwasher and helping with the laundry. You would be AMAZED at how many laundry steps young children can accomplish with a little instruction! (Think of a preschooler throwing wet clothes from the washer down to your toddler, who stuffs them into the dryer....)

Now we are ready for school. School in our home is known better as "fun time with Mama!" Both older children participate while my baby naps. At the table, my son can do sticker books, color, sort "counting bears," write on the slate or dry-erase board, or even just play with a toy. Reading time is all-inclusive as well, and my lap can be quite full, especially if it's time to nurse again! We use a literature-based curriculum so this might not work as well for those using traditional workbook-style curriculum.

Finally, remember that hymn of the week and creed? We teach our children these things so that they will be able to PARTICIPATE in worship on Sundays. How lovely to hear little lips singing God's praises, and reciting what they "believe!" Our prayer is that as they grow in maturity, they will understand these beliefs more and that God will reveal to them who they are and Who He is. During the sermon, I do allow very young ones to draw or color quietly, but they must participate when they are able to do so.

Once again, plan for your little ones, include them, and never underestimate their abilities. A little work on the front end will save a lot of work in the end!

So what fun are YOU having?

My life is so fun! When's the last time YOU wrote "Australia" on a piece of toilet paper and slid it under the bathroom door? You should try it sometime.

A Snapshot of My Life

We are riding back from Kroger. It's about 4:30. I'm tired from pushing one of those car carts, three kids, and a load of groceries. The back of the van is piled high with sports equipment, a guitar case, and of course, the groceries.

Owen is screaming. "IT'S TUMMIN OUT!!!! POO POO IS TWYIN TO TUM OUT WIGHT NOW!!!!" He is inconsolable. His voice has an odd edge to it, like any minute he might proclaim, "I am Legion!" There isn't anywhere to pull over, and what if I do? Should I let him do his business on someone's lawn?

Audrey is looking at him calmly. Her hair is sticking up like a perfect, feathery mohawk. Katie licked her hands in the store and styled it that way.

Katie has a book that has a little keyboard attached. She's playing "Silent Night." And awaiting the spanking she will receive at home for disobeying and climbing into the FRONT of the cart with Audrey. She's lucky she didn't fall and break something.

"My joy is in Christ....my joy is in Christ....my joy is in Christ...."

I'm Back!

It's good to be back. Sort of. I had 103 emails to either read or delete. Honestly, I was in total withdrawal for about two days. After that, the time I had devoted to being online was absorbed by other things. With or without the computer, I end the day with things still not crossed off my to do list. You make time for what you want to do, I suppose.

Highlights of the past week include, but are not limited to, the following.

I told Owen that he couldn't play with his food. He screamed, "You are EVIL to me!" Knowing that his daddy has been letting him watch Star Wars, I replied, "Do you mean I am evil, like Darth Vader?" Owen's face went from angry to contemplative. "Yes, Dark Vader is MAD."

Audrey is terrified of the vaccum cleaner. The really bad part is that she won't crawl away from it - she wants ME! She crawls right to me and hangs on me until I pick her up. So the next time you are vaccuming and thinking how tired you are, just imagine doing it with a kid on your hip.

I took my last prenatal/postnatal vitamin. I've been on those babies for years now. CRAZY! I suppose my hair will fall out. Maybe it will be an improvement.

Owen loves coffee. Ms. Teri got him started on that when he was the only kid in the nursery. For the Sunday School hour they would share biscotti and coffee. So a few days ago I made him his own cup (1/4 coffee and 3/4 milk). He was sitting at the table, watching me rush around to get breakfast going. Then he pulled out the chair beside his and patted it, asking, "You want to sit by me and drink coffee, Mama?" How can a Mama say no to THAT?!?!

Kevin is reading "The Apple and The Arrow" to Katie at night. She likes to act out the parts. So when William Tell was about to shoot the arrow from Walter's head, Katie was stretching her arms out, too. Kevin read, "Tell stretched the bow out before him, with muscles rippling on his brown arm." Katie squinted her eyes and stared at her arm. Hilarious. (Guess you had to be there.)

Mom Hinton got her hair cut. When Owen saw her he exclaimed, "Grandma! You comb you hair?!?!"

Frugal deal of the week: I went to Kroger and bought two boxes of Kellogg's Frosted Mini Wheats, two boxes of Kellogg's Corn Pops, two boxes of Rice Krispy Treats, two boxes of Nutrigrain Eggo Frozen Waffles, and two packages of Keebler Fudge Shopppe cookes - for $11.54. Then I went home and ripped of the ten UPC codes and mailed it in for a $10 rebate check. FREE FOOD.

Random thought for today: It is my opinion that there should be two versions of nutritional content for Cheetos Puffs - one for the top of the bag, and one for the bottom.

And...I added a couple of new Bad Church Signs, below right.

That is all. I have no time to be witty. Carry on.

My Recompense is With My God!

For some reason, I often have ladies confide in me about marital issues. I take this very seriously and be sure to search the scriptures before I spout off advice - I wish I did this for everything I'm asked about! Over time I've found myself saying the same thing over and over. YOU CANNOT CHANGE YOUR HUSBAND. Only God is in the business of changing hearts. Focus on your own heart. Do what you are called by God Almighty to do, and pray for your husband.

Then today, as I was reading from Isaiah and thinking about OTHERS, the Spirit spoke to my own heart. Doesn't this same principle apply to my own struggles? I train my children. Oh, I DO train them. Over and over. In the same areas. Until I think I might lose.....my......mind!!! Why will these children not LEARN? Do they not understand that my consistancy will not be lacking (okay, MOST days!) and that they will continue to reap the reward of their sin?

I told Kevin last week that I have HAD IT UP TO HERE and we'd better get a tent put up because someone needed to GET SAVED. I told him that the unregenerates had me outnumbered and I didn't like it ONE BIT.

Then this morning I heard that echo of what I've told others. YOU CANNOT CHANGE YOUR CHILDREN. Only God is in the business of changing hearts. Focus on your own heart. Do what you are called by God Almighty to do, and pray for your children. (Then beat them. HAHAHAHA!!!! Oh, yeah, wait...this is a public blog....don't call CPS!)

And what *am* I called to do? I am called to love my children. I am called to train them in righteousness. I am called to be an instrument of the Holy Spirit in showing them their sin and their need for Christ. I am called to point them to the cross as their only means of salvation. And I am called to teach them that they can do none of what I ask of them by their own strength, but that there is hope in Christ.

(Side note - obviously my role as a mother is different than my role as a wife when it comes to pointing out sin! LOL!)

In my scripture reading today from Isaiah 49, I read this verse:

"But I said, 'I have labored in vain; I have spent my strength for nothing and vanity; yet surely my right is with the LORD, and my recompense with my God.'"

It is possible to feel that everything I do is in vain, even when I am obeying God. But my recompense is with my God!