How has autism impacted you as a person (not just a mom)?
My immediate thought was that there are pros and cons. But as I considered these two lists, something stood out. All the cons were from a temporal perspective.
- I have to sit in the lobby at band concerts, and Kevin couldn't be with me at my nephew's wedding.
- We have to turn down some fun things we're invited to because of fear of elopement or meltdowns.
- I am exhausted most of the time.
- I have to work really, really hard to understand my son and to have any kind of meaningful connection with him.
- I have to work really, really hard to teach Eli new things and to not regress in what he already can do.
- We can't be on a homeschool schedule anymore because Eli gets on the bus before 7:00 a.m.
- Sometimes I don't want to research anymore.
- Or squirt one more capsule of omega oil on a spoon with applesauce and precariously walk it over to give to Eli.
- Or change poop. LOTS OF POOP.
There's plenty more, but you get the picture.
- Then I realized that the pros are all ETERNAL! And they are of way more value than the cons. God has used autism in my life, which is pretty amazing.
- He has taught me to love sacrificially.
- He has taught me to never assume and always think the best.
- He has surrounded me by friends, family, and professionals who love Eli and the rest of my family and are a constant source of encouragement.
- He has developed His Spirit's fruit in my life - love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control - in a way He could never have done without Eli.
- He has shown His strength in my weakness.
- He has made me long for His coming, when all will be made right.
- He has shown me that He is all I need.
- He has turned autism into a gift. Now that's AMAZING!
(Thank you for the thought-provoking question, Jen!)
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